Dream, dream, dream 14.09.07
Dreams are things we badly want,
Covet, long for, desire.
They can be very big or very small,
These things to which we aspire.
They give us hope to think of,
Reason to the life we live.
But often these dreams are improbable,
Like catching water in a sieve.
But they are a necessity
They give us motive, reason, and an aim.
And even in the darkest of times,
A dream can light a flame.
Without a dream or aspiration,
Lives are lived with no meaning.
We hope for things we’ll never have.
And so we keep on dreaming.
Ryan Rodwell
Woke up this morning, and realised how many lifelong goals I have, aspirations . . . dreams. So I dived into my collection of old poems and found this one from several months ago.
Hope you enjoy :D:D
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
我爱你淑豪
Just finished typing out a poem i wrote today and yesterday. Hope whoever reads it enjoys it, but Amber (Shu Hao) most of all :)
A thousand Times More Fair; Ten Thousand Times More Rich 08.01.08
(Written for someone special)
Your scarf tucked cosy around your neck,
The hair that it sits under.
Your overall attractive appearance,
Makes my heart beat like thunder.
Your hair is as dark as the eyes of a swan,
And as soft as a feather duster.
Every glance, at you, I take;
Makes my heartbeat fluster.
Your smile is as bright as the sun itself,
Your teeth as white as snow.
Even the very thought of you,
Makes my heartbeat grow.
Very uplifting is your complexion,
And the happy expression on your face.
Every time you smile at me,
My heartbeat starts to race.
I often greet you with a great big hug,
Or a kiss upon your lips.
That space of time may be less than a second,
But I’m sure my heartbeat skips.
I’m sure it’s more than just your appearance,
My love for you is vaster.
But every time you’re on my mind,
My heartbeat gets much faster.
I know I’ll love you for all my life,
And maybe even longer.
For every day that seems to pass,
My heartbeat sure gets stronger.
My heartbeat, for you, is speeding;
Pumping as if pneumatic.
Every time I stand beside you,
My heartbeat goes erratic.
Because you are a thousand times more fair,
Ten thousand times more rich;
Than any other girl I’ve ever seen.
You change my heartbeat’s pitch.
Ryan Rodwell
Enjoy =]
A thousand Times More Fair; Ten Thousand Times More Rich 08.01.08
(Written for someone special)
Your scarf tucked cosy around your neck,
The hair that it sits under.
Your overall attractive appearance,
Makes my heart beat like thunder.
Your hair is as dark as the eyes of a swan,
And as soft as a feather duster.
Every glance, at you, I take;
Makes my heartbeat fluster.
Your smile is as bright as the sun itself,
Your teeth as white as snow.
Even the very thought of you,
Makes my heartbeat grow.
Very uplifting is your complexion,
And the happy expression on your face.
Every time you smile at me,
My heartbeat starts to race.
I often greet you with a great big hug,
Or a kiss upon your lips.
That space of time may be less than a second,
But I’m sure my heartbeat skips.
I’m sure it’s more than just your appearance,
My love for you is vaster.
But every time you’re on my mind,
My heartbeat gets much faster.
I know I’ll love you for all my life,
And maybe even longer.
For every day that seems to pass,
My heartbeat sure gets stronger.
My heartbeat, for you, is speeding;
Pumping as if pneumatic.
Every time I stand beside you,
My heartbeat goes erratic.
Because you are a thousand times more fair,
Ten thousand times more rich;
Than any other girl I’ve ever seen.
You change my heartbeat’s pitch.
Ryan Rodwell
Enjoy =]
Monday, January 7, 2008
Blog change
Hey everyone, I've just changed the main reason for my blog. Where it started out as a showcase for my photographs, that never really kicked off due to the lack of photoediting toold so I have changed my blog and instead I shall now be (hopefully every other day) posting up a poem that I personally have written.
To start it off, I'm going to put up the first poem I ever wrote since I started taking poetry seriously. Its title is also that of a book of poems by myself that I hope to publish in the next year.
Power of Words 11.09.07
Words can tell truths, words can tell lies;
words are often mysteries put in disguise.
Words can ask a question, words give an answer;
Words say "Well done" to a competitive dancer.
Words can bring joy, but also bring sorrow;
words said today, can echo tomorrow.
Words from the head and words from the heart;
words we remember, words when we part.
Words can come early, but also come late;
words can grow love, but can also cause hate.
Words can change votes and words can start wars;
but words can unlock metaphorical doors.
Words can build bridges, or break them down;
words bring a smile, but too often a frown.
Words of forgiveness or words of cheer;
words that we read, and words that we hear.
Words we remember, or try and forget;
words make us thankful, or make us regret.
Words are emotions spilled on a page;
or told through a story, or said on stage.
Words give us heartbreak, and make us sad;
but they make us remember, good times that we had.
One man spoke, and the world could hear;
"I have a dream" was said very clear.
Words are written and words are spoke;
words can be serious, or they can tell a joke.
Words gain you popularity, or lose you support;
the words "Not guilty" we pray for in court.
Words make us laugh, and words make us cry;
Words fill the minute, and make time go by.
Some words we listen, some we ignore;
words give us comfort, or can make us sore.
Words that are harsh, words that are fair;
words we can use, to show that we care.
Words we note down, and words we omit;
words tell the crimes we didn’t commit.
If one man speaks, a thousand might listen;
his words are valued, and like gold they glisten.
Words said through anger, words said through prayer;
words we can tolerate, or words we can’t bear.
Words that are lies or words sincere;
Words make us grin, or shed a tear.
Words that are private, words that we share;
words that we promise, or solemnly swear.
To whisper, to talk, to shout or to yell;
words put together, the feelings they tell.
Words that we use, but are not quite sure;
of the hurt they'll cause or the smiles they'll ensure.
Words of tenacity, words of might;
Words that are dim, and words that are bright.
Words we really mean, and words we just say;
words we said previously, we regret today.
The words that we wait for, and the words we plead;
the words that we want, more words that we need.
Words spoken out by the smallest voice;
cannot be heard, it’s not our choice.
Words say "I’m sorry", words say "its fine";
Words we accept, or words we decline.
Words that are said straight, or words we bend;
words we keep with us, 'til the very end.
Words are a thought, opinion or belief;
some words dig deeper, to the harsh truth beneath.
Words are just letters, scrambled together;
but words can be powerful, so use them forever.
Ryan Rodwell
I hope this change will mean I post more often, im sure Amber hopes that too. When you read this amber, remember I love you :D
Later everyone
To start it off, I'm going to put up the first poem I ever wrote since I started taking poetry seriously. Its title is also that of a book of poems by myself that I hope to publish in the next year.
Power of Words 11.09.07
Words can tell truths, words can tell lies;
words are often mysteries put in disguise.
Words can ask a question, words give an answer;
Words say "Well done" to a competitive dancer.
Words can bring joy, but also bring sorrow;
words said today, can echo tomorrow.
Words from the head and words from the heart;
words we remember, words when we part.
Words can come early, but also come late;
words can grow love, but can also cause hate.
Words can change votes and words can start wars;
but words can unlock metaphorical doors.
Words can build bridges, or break them down;
words bring a smile, but too often a frown.
Words of forgiveness or words of cheer;
words that we read, and words that we hear.
Words we remember, or try and forget;
words make us thankful, or make us regret.
Words are emotions spilled on a page;
or told through a story, or said on stage.
Words give us heartbreak, and make us sad;
but they make us remember, good times that we had.
One man spoke, and the world could hear;
"I have a dream" was said very clear.
Words are written and words are spoke;
words can be serious, or they can tell a joke.
Words gain you popularity, or lose you support;
the words "Not guilty" we pray for in court.
Words make us laugh, and words make us cry;
Words fill the minute, and make time go by.
Some words we listen, some we ignore;
words give us comfort, or can make us sore.
Words that are harsh, words that are fair;
words we can use, to show that we care.
Words we note down, and words we omit;
words tell the crimes we didn’t commit.
If one man speaks, a thousand might listen;
his words are valued, and like gold they glisten.
Words said through anger, words said through prayer;
words we can tolerate, or words we can’t bear.
Words that are lies or words sincere;
Words make us grin, or shed a tear.
Words that are private, words that we share;
words that we promise, or solemnly swear.
To whisper, to talk, to shout or to yell;
words put together, the feelings they tell.
Words that we use, but are not quite sure;
of the hurt they'll cause or the smiles they'll ensure.
Words of tenacity, words of might;
Words that are dim, and words that are bright.
Words we really mean, and words we just say;
words we said previously, we regret today.
The words that we wait for, and the words we plead;
the words that we want, more words that we need.
Words spoken out by the smallest voice;
cannot be heard, it’s not our choice.
Words say "I’m sorry", words say "its fine";
Words we accept, or words we decline.
Words that are said straight, or words we bend;
words we keep with us, 'til the very end.
Words are a thought, opinion or belief;
some words dig deeper, to the harsh truth beneath.
Words are just letters, scrambled together;
but words can be powerful, so use them forever.
Ryan Rodwell
I hope this change will mean I post more often, im sure Amber hopes that too. When you read this amber, remember I love you :D
Later everyone
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
*ashamed*
Recently brought to my attention was the lack of posting on my blog and the neglect it has suffered in the last 2 months. In spite of my best efforts to conjure up some interesting or otherwise humorous story, the neglect of my blog occurred due to my shear ignorance and lack of willingness to write about current events.
But now I mysteriously find myself posting once again, in full hope of all manner of forgiveness being expressed to me in an act of goodwill.
Christmas was, overall, a pleasing result, despite it being slashed in half by a visit to my dads meaning that I had two days of opening presents as opposed to the one i was initially familiar with.
This new year came about as expected, a whole lot of anticipation that was crushed by the realisation that the second the year changes, is over as soon as the next second comes. A full month of excitement growing and brewing for a shimmering moment in life that lasts only a second. I shall remember that moment next year and cancel out all kinds of expectation so as not to be disappointed. The night was good overall, i enjoyed it at a friends sleepover, talking about random senselessness until 9am, when I called my mum with a plea to take me home as I was on the brink of an asthma attack. On that night however, I learned about the realities of my hand-eye coordination problem and how occupational therapists succeed in making mountains out of molehills. My performance in Guitar Hero improved massively after a ruff start and I excelled so much as to beat my gf in, as far as i can remember, 4 rounds in a row =D.
Since then my life has just been laying low, waiting for that ever elusive excitement. Since christmas I bought 13 dvds and my mum is having a fit about that. She also wont stop making jokes about my gf's vampire attack on me ;);) haha, she knows im only joking :p
Well, time is of the essence and its time for me to go.
'Twas nice catching up with my blog (whatever the hell thats supposed 2 mean) haha
Talk to yous all later, *Ryan out*
But now I mysteriously find myself posting once again, in full hope of all manner of forgiveness being expressed to me in an act of goodwill.
Christmas was, overall, a pleasing result, despite it being slashed in half by a visit to my dads meaning that I had two days of opening presents as opposed to the one i was initially familiar with.
This new year came about as expected, a whole lot of anticipation that was crushed by the realisation that the second the year changes, is over as soon as the next second comes. A full month of excitement growing and brewing for a shimmering moment in life that lasts only a second. I shall remember that moment next year and cancel out all kinds of expectation so as not to be disappointed. The night was good overall, i enjoyed it at a friends sleepover, talking about random senselessness until 9am, when I called my mum with a plea to take me home as I was on the brink of an asthma attack. On that night however, I learned about the realities of my hand-eye coordination problem and how occupational therapists succeed in making mountains out of molehills. My performance in Guitar Hero improved massively after a ruff start and I excelled so much as to beat my gf in, as far as i can remember, 4 rounds in a row =D.
Since then my life has just been laying low, waiting for that ever elusive excitement. Since christmas I bought 13 dvds and my mum is having a fit about that. She also wont stop making jokes about my gf's vampire attack on me ;);) haha, she knows im only joking :p
Well, time is of the essence and its time for me to go.
'Twas nice catching up with my blog (whatever the hell thats supposed 2 mean) haha
Talk to yous all later, *Ryan out*
Monday, November 5, 2007
Reoccurance
Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. These words successfully anounce my unconditional return to my blog which, for so long, suffered the neglect and abandonement that it was not liable to deserve. Regardless of that, here i am, casting down the events, thoughts and opinions that have guilefully became obstacles in my proverbial path of life.
Starting with the last time I posted, various things have occured not entirely without incident. My grandfather was rushed to hospital after he lost conciousness and was connected up to machines to aid his breathing. Fortunately, this panic did not go on for long as several days after, he regained conciousness and was sent to his local hospital back in Gloucester (i wish i could spell it).
My brother has been round the house a few more days than normal, possibely due to his regretable assault in Belfast which resulted in a meager bottling on the face, which left him looking rather a dodgy character for an interview he had the next day. Despite his large bruise and black eye, the interview supposedly went very well.
Amber returns back to Northern Ireland at the end of this week, a long and eagerly anticipated homecoming. Considering that Amber may be the only one reading this, i have no hesitation in expressing my unreserved adoration and unmitigated love for her. Quite frankly Amber, I am besotted with you *hug - waits eagerly for a response*. Dont forget to ask ur dad about said-chess set, and hurry up and come home lol.
Apologies in advance for the randomness of my next topic to be covered, but no words can express the anger, vexation, exation, exasperation, displeasure, crossness, irritation, irritability, indignation, pique, annoyance, fury, wrath, ire, outrage, irascibility, ill temper and aggravation caused by the unexpected detriment that inflicted me. While contently playing upon my xbox, i knew not of what horrors would befall me when suddenly the controller, which i held in my hand, snapped in two. Only after picking three shards of plastic from my flesh did it occur to me that not only was I in physical pain from the slicing of my hand, but all i was in emotional pain from the loss of my xbox controller's ability to function which has now resulted in the explicable loss of my ability to use the xbox. I still have not determined if I underetimated my own strength, or if Microsoft have belligerently released several products containing flaws, that they know full well will break in ones hands and cause shards of platic to sink into the skin of the palm and provoke the undesirable flow of blood. Either way, i still mourn at the loss of my controller. However, being optimistic, i look at the brighter side of things. Now when Im on msn chatting, the xobx can no longer distract from much more significant and importent conversations.
Today I have endured what no one should ever have to endure. I have sat and watched a feature length, headmelting, unearthly, nightmarish performance on the television by Zac Efron and other High School Musical cast members, who only succeeded in proving to me that there ARE movies more horrific than those based on Stephen King novels. It wasnt a case of the movie itself being bad, but the way in which it had a hold on me, and somehow clamped down on my ability to turn it over, is more scarey than anything Freddy Cruger could offer me. No offense Freddy, but 'Troy Bolton' sends shivers down my spine and causes my skin to crawl were-as you only make me laugh at your weird burnt face and sharp glove.
It has just occured to me that my sleep-indiced rambling in all probability isnt making sense so I shall leave my post here, and try to post MUCH more often. As often, infact, as time, work, mental capacity and mood will allow. But, for all those who care to read, goodnight. *clicks on 'publish post'*
Starting with the last time I posted, various things have occured not entirely without incident. My grandfather was rushed to hospital after he lost conciousness and was connected up to machines to aid his breathing. Fortunately, this panic did not go on for long as several days after, he regained conciousness and was sent to his local hospital back in Gloucester (i wish i could spell it).
My brother has been round the house a few more days than normal, possibely due to his regretable assault in Belfast which resulted in a meager bottling on the face, which left him looking rather a dodgy character for an interview he had the next day. Despite his large bruise and black eye, the interview supposedly went very well.
Amber returns back to Northern Ireland at the end of this week, a long and eagerly anticipated homecoming. Considering that Amber may be the only one reading this, i have no hesitation in expressing my unreserved adoration and unmitigated love for her. Quite frankly Amber, I am besotted with you *hug - waits eagerly for a response*. Dont forget to ask ur dad about said-chess set, and hurry up and come home lol.
Apologies in advance for the randomness of my next topic to be covered, but no words can express the anger, vexation, exation, exasperation, displeasure, crossness, irritation, irritability, indignation, pique, annoyance, fury, wrath, ire, outrage, irascibility, ill temper and aggravation caused by the unexpected detriment that inflicted me. While contently playing upon my xbox, i knew not of what horrors would befall me when suddenly the controller, which i held in my hand, snapped in two. Only after picking three shards of plastic from my flesh did it occur to me that not only was I in physical pain from the slicing of my hand, but all i was in emotional pain from the loss of my xbox controller's ability to function which has now resulted in the explicable loss of my ability to use the xbox. I still have not determined if I underetimated my own strength, or if Microsoft have belligerently released several products containing flaws, that they know full well will break in ones hands and cause shards of platic to sink into the skin of the palm and provoke the undesirable flow of blood. Either way, i still mourn at the loss of my controller. However, being optimistic, i look at the brighter side of things. Now when Im on msn chatting, the xobx can no longer distract from much more significant and importent conversations.
Today I have endured what no one should ever have to endure. I have sat and watched a feature length, headmelting, unearthly, nightmarish performance on the television by Zac Efron and other High School Musical cast members, who only succeeded in proving to me that there ARE movies more horrific than those based on Stephen King novels. It wasnt a case of the movie itself being bad, but the way in which it had a hold on me, and somehow clamped down on my ability to turn it over, is more scarey than anything Freddy Cruger could offer me. No offense Freddy, but 'Troy Bolton' sends shivers down my spine and causes my skin to crawl were-as you only make me laugh at your weird burnt face and sharp glove.
It has just occured to me that my sleep-indiced rambling in all probability isnt making sense so I shall leave my post here, and try to post MUCH more often. As often, infact, as time, work, mental capacity and mood will allow. But, for all those who care to read, goodnight. *clicks on 'publish post'*
Monday, October 15, 2007
Lalala
I haven't written to my blog in a fair while now. I thought it was entirely necessary but recent circumstances denied me the ability to write in it. So here I am, the afternoon of Monday the 15th of October 2007, writing an entry on my laptop that will later be uploaded onto my blog page for all the people to read. The last week and a half have been fairly and otherwise elusively awkward for a number of reasons primarily revolving around maintaining the stability of my family.
It would seem that I, despite this intense emotional weight, am the only one who has to ability to work my way through struggles and find early solutions to the shit that life throws in our direction. Due to the apparent lack of rental payments made by my brother, my dad is therefore liable to cover the cost. In the event that he fails to do this he will in all probability be sued for an amount of money that, quite frankly, he doesn't have. This may lead to a jail sentence, provided that he doesn't flee to Dubai before that happens. And if this rent isn't paid my brother will face eviction with nowhere else to go, and few mates who would actually be willing to shack him up on account of his perpetual inefficiency to repay those who give to him. Will he go homeless?
Besides all that, I am well. Moderately healthy, and quite happy, the only fly in the ointment being the previously said slight emotional burden of maintain the stability of a volatile family. School continues on as normal with average results in all homework so far, one exception being English Lit, were I have yet to find if it is a talent or a weak spot that for one teacher I get Bs in all my homework so far, whereas the other teacher gives me only Cs. Either way, I enjoy it and that is the main thing as far as I am concerned. History is fairly ambiguous in the sense that I just can't get a grasp in it. I know what we're learning about, I take everything that is said into consideration, but try as I may when it comes to the test I do a direct nosedive, falling fast and hitting the ground with such force that I hate waiting to receive the results several days after. Theatre Studies is great, we finally started doing some practical exercises which are more enjoyable than the usual writing and note-taking. But yeah, it just occurred to me that people reading this are not interested in my school...nor am i for that matter but I like to think about how its going.
*10 Minutes pass as Ryan thinks of what to write next*
The results for the poetry competition have not came back yet. I asked my English teacher, who is also in charge of the whole thing, and he explained that the poems he had sent away have most likely been held up with the unavoidable postal-strike. No matter, I shall know soon enough if my poem was even slightly of standard equal to a qualified poet who marks and evaluates all the entries. I counted earlier and it turn out that I have written 28 poems since I wrote the entry to that competition. Maybe about 10 of those are personal and another 2 or 3 or meaningless and a waste of time for anyone who would read it, but Im looking into getting most, if not all of the other ones sent away to be considered for publishing =]
It would seem that I, despite this intense emotional weight, am the only one who has to ability to work my way through struggles and find early solutions to the shit that life throws in our direction. Due to the apparent lack of rental payments made by my brother, my dad is therefore liable to cover the cost. In the event that he fails to do this he will in all probability be sued for an amount of money that, quite frankly, he doesn't have. This may lead to a jail sentence, provided that he doesn't flee to Dubai before that happens. And if this rent isn't paid my brother will face eviction with nowhere else to go, and few mates who would actually be willing to shack him up on account of his perpetual inefficiency to repay those who give to him. Will he go homeless?
Besides all that, I am well. Moderately healthy, and quite happy, the only fly in the ointment being the previously said slight emotional burden of maintain the stability of a volatile family. School continues on as normal with average results in all homework so far, one exception being English Lit, were I have yet to find if it is a talent or a weak spot that for one teacher I get Bs in all my homework so far, whereas the other teacher gives me only Cs. Either way, I enjoy it and that is the main thing as far as I am concerned. History is fairly ambiguous in the sense that I just can't get a grasp in it. I know what we're learning about, I take everything that is said into consideration, but try as I may when it comes to the test I do a direct nosedive, falling fast and hitting the ground with such force that I hate waiting to receive the results several days after. Theatre Studies is great, we finally started doing some practical exercises which are more enjoyable than the usual writing and note-taking. But yeah, it just occurred to me that people reading this are not interested in my school...nor am i for that matter but I like to think about how its going.
*10 Minutes pass as Ryan thinks of what to write next*
The results for the poetry competition have not came back yet. I asked my English teacher, who is also in charge of the whole thing, and he explained that the poems he had sent away have most likely been held up with the unavoidable postal-strike. No matter, I shall know soon enough if my poem was even slightly of standard equal to a qualified poet who marks and evaluates all the entries. I counted earlier and it turn out that I have written 28 poems since I wrote the entry to that competition. Maybe about 10 of those are personal and another 2 or 3 or meaningless and a waste of time for anyone who would read it, but Im looking into getting most, if not all of the other ones sent away to be considered for publishing =]
Friday, October 5, 2007
Prodigal Son Returns
With the help of a kind-hearted compadré was this blog page established. I felt it would be considerably mean and otherwise ignorant if were to simply neglect it.
So here's to my first round of the best game in the world..."Remember Everything Good You've Done Since Last Week." So it is as a token of thanks that i offer this circumlocutory declamation.
Well, erm....*thinks deeply in silence*
Oh, last weekend was really significant so ill talk most about that. I took part in photographing a Burma Peace Rally in O'Connell Street in Dublin. The people of Dublin had gathered to offer their support to the brave peoples of Burma who are protesting for democracy. I took many good pictures but as I was only helping my dad, very few of them were considered. When he emailed away 5 of his pictures to the agency he works for, however, he emailed away 3 of mine also. These are shown below....
Much to my misfortune, none of these showed up in the newspapers the following day. My dad managed to get one on the front cover of The Sunday Times though. Taking up a quarter of the page, and being the only picture n the cover, gave him something to smile about.
After that i went with him while he photographed the Irish President Mary Macaleese attending the 300th anniversary service of a Church of Ireland. I acquired minimal amusement from this as we could clearly see that there was no place she'd rather be less than there. My dad took a brilliant picture of her scowling at the black doorman, leading to mine and his discussion on the way home as to whether or not she was secretly a clandestine racist, Did she only attend the meeting for publicity within the church, and isn't she the owner of a self-centred attitude and is stuck-up, overly pride-full, and who has an opinion of inferiority for everyone but herself, especially those of ethnic origin? Baa...that was a big long question.
Anyway, later the next day I went out for lunch with my dad and one of his friends. Here I learned, in a conversation not even directed to me, that my dad plans on moving to Dubai next year. This came as a shock as he had clearly thought it over, and it was obviously premeditated, and the first time i hear about it he is actually talking to his friend. I ask myself questions, "was i meant to hear?", "was he going to tell me anytime soon?", "how long has he been planning this?", "does he know what effect him saying that has had on my emotional and psychological stability?". I guess/hope (delete were appropriate) all will be answered in good time.
I went home that evening to find that no-one had seen or heard from my brother in up to three days. *Bang* - it hit me like a train. It couldn't have hit me harder if it actually was a train. I start panicking...its the moment that i have nightmares about. My head spins and suddenly I find myself in a state of dizziness and supreme nausea. I feel faint, and the headache that ensues my dizziness is unbelievably averse. I return home and talk to people on msn, revealing them more of the negative points of my weekend as opposed to the good. They seem very supportive though, which is a benefit of helping people emotionally as much as I do...they're always keen to repay you.
This last week has been HUGELY confusing. With school work being mixed around, friendships being blown out then re-lit, people liking and trusting me then abusing me in an audacious act of vexation. It has the powerful ability to undermine anyone's emotional stability, but thankfully to a few good people, mine has been retained thus far. But it has enlightened me, however, as to the grim finish beneath the glossy veneer of adolescent life.
We (here meaning: me, my occupational therapist, and my parents) have succeeded in our gallant attempts to acquire the acquiescence for me to use a laptop for all my classes in school. It has been beneficial, as on Tuesday i had 8 periods in private study i set about working on a report for a play i saw to weeks ago, that was due in today. I later learned that, with the use of a laptop, i managed to write 2,786 words...which made me near choke as I was so shocked at how much there was. I remember last year spending about a week planning and doing a 600 worded English essay...well my theatre studies report has surpassed any GCSE coursework I've ever handed in, and maybe as I'm starting to suspect, all of them put together as well.
Wow, I've written a lot in this last period, as the bell is now ringing, marking the end of the first of two periods. BREAK TIME!!! brb lol.
Back lol, break was good...the sun was too bright though, couldn't see.
Now...were was I. Oh yes, my theatre studies report. I hope its included all the necessary points that I needed to include as opposed to just being 2,786 words of sheer verbal verbal diarrhoea.
Now I sit hear listening to Pipe and Brass bands playing Highland Cathedral...a hymn i remember from my mums wedding when she married my step-dad Harry. The bagpipe player at the wedding was sufficient, but its fair to say the song doesn't sound the same unless played by a number of people playing bagpipes with an additional band to go along with that. Brilliant tune though, very inspirational.
I have history next :(:( don't like it very much...very boring. My favourite subject would have to be theatre studies, quite simple because we ALWAYS have a laugh at sum point during the lesson. We often find ourselves debating about various things as well. Eg. Half the class is vegetarian, so I take great delight in terrorising them, telling them exactly how rare i like to eat my steak. Then there's English LIt. which i quite enjoy. Not because I enjoy reading...but because unlike the vast majority of the population I love writing, and there's lots of it to do in English. I like it mainly because i apparently) have a talent for maundering with rather considerable verbosity. :-). What iss the point in being laconic? It doesn't achieve anything.
I just used the dictionary application on my laptop and entered 'blog':
blog
noun
a Web site on which an individual or group of users produces an ongoing narrative
hmm..."ongoing". That means continuous, ceaseless, unfaltering, endless, and none-the-less unremitting. What madness drove me to consider carrying out such an unnecessary and perpetual act of sheer superfluousness? Oh yes, that's right, I remember that people are supposedly to come on and read this. Well folks, i can tell you...if you manage to get to this part of my entry, well done :). Because its been fun writing it...and I hope you enjoy reading it just as much. Hopefully it wont take as long though.
But now as this 2nd period draws to an end, i must finish up and say my fairwells. Cheerio for now, I'll try posting as often as I can from now on.
Bubi xx
So here's to my first round of the best game in the world..."Remember Everything Good You've Done Since Last Week." So it is as a token of thanks that i offer this circumlocutory declamation.
Well, erm....*thinks deeply in silence*
Oh, last weekend was really significant so ill talk most about that. I took part in photographing a Burma Peace Rally in O'Connell Street in Dublin. The people of Dublin had gathered to offer their support to the brave peoples of Burma who are protesting for democracy. I took many good pictures but as I was only helping my dad, very few of them were considered. When he emailed away 5 of his pictures to the agency he works for, however, he emailed away 3 of mine also. These are shown below....
Much to my misfortune, none of these showed up in the newspapers the following day. My dad managed to get one on the front cover of The Sunday Times though. Taking up a quarter of the page, and being the only picture n the cover, gave him something to smile about.
After that i went with him while he photographed the Irish President Mary Macaleese attending the 300th anniversary service of a Church of Ireland. I acquired minimal amusement from this as we could clearly see that there was no place she'd rather be less than there. My dad took a brilliant picture of her scowling at the black doorman, leading to mine and his discussion on the way home as to whether or not she was secretly a clandestine racist, Did she only attend the meeting for publicity within the church, and isn't she the owner of a self-centred attitude and is stuck-up, overly pride-full, and who has an opinion of inferiority for everyone but herself, especially those of ethnic origin? Baa...that was a big long question.
Anyway, later the next day I went out for lunch with my dad and one of his friends. Here I learned, in a conversation not even directed to me, that my dad plans on moving to Dubai next year. This came as a shock as he had clearly thought it over, and it was obviously premeditated, and the first time i hear about it he is actually talking to his friend. I ask myself questions, "was i meant to hear?", "was he going to tell me anytime soon?", "how long has he been planning this?", "does he know what effect him saying that has had on my emotional and psychological stability?". I guess/hope (delete were appropriate) all will be answered in good time.
I went home that evening to find that no-one had seen or heard from my brother in up to three days. *Bang* - it hit me like a train. It couldn't have hit me harder if it actually was a train. I start panicking...its the moment that i have nightmares about. My head spins and suddenly I find myself in a state of dizziness and supreme nausea. I feel faint, and the headache that ensues my dizziness is unbelievably averse. I return home and talk to people on msn, revealing them more of the negative points of my weekend as opposed to the good. They seem very supportive though, which is a benefit of helping people emotionally as much as I do...they're always keen to repay you.
This last week has been HUGELY confusing. With school work being mixed around, friendships being blown out then re-lit, people liking and trusting me then abusing me in an audacious act of vexation. It has the powerful ability to undermine anyone's emotional stability, but thankfully to a few good people, mine has been retained thus far. But it has enlightened me, however, as to the grim finish beneath the glossy veneer of adolescent life.
We (here meaning: me, my occupational therapist, and my parents) have succeeded in our gallant attempts to acquire the acquiescence for me to use a laptop for all my classes in school. It has been beneficial, as on Tuesday i had 8 periods in private study i set about working on a report for a play i saw to weeks ago, that was due in today. I later learned that, with the use of a laptop, i managed to write 2,786 words...which made me near choke as I was so shocked at how much there was. I remember last year spending about a week planning and doing a 600 worded English essay...well my theatre studies report has surpassed any GCSE coursework I've ever handed in, and maybe as I'm starting to suspect, all of them put together as well.
Wow, I've written a lot in this last period, as the bell is now ringing, marking the end of the first of two periods. BREAK TIME!!! brb lol.
Back lol, break was good...the sun was too bright though, couldn't see.
Now...were was I. Oh yes, my theatre studies report. I hope its included all the necessary points that I needed to include as opposed to just being 2,786 words of sheer verbal verbal diarrhoea.
Now I sit hear listening to Pipe and Brass bands playing Highland Cathedral...a hymn i remember from my mums wedding when she married my step-dad Harry. The bagpipe player at the wedding was sufficient, but its fair to say the song doesn't sound the same unless played by a number of people playing bagpipes with an additional band to go along with that. Brilliant tune though, very inspirational.
I have history next :(:( don't like it very much...very boring. My favourite subject would have to be theatre studies, quite simple because we ALWAYS have a laugh at sum point during the lesson. We often find ourselves debating about various things as well. Eg. Half the class is vegetarian, so I take great delight in terrorising them, telling them exactly how rare i like to eat my steak. Then there's English LIt. which i quite enjoy. Not because I enjoy reading...but because unlike the vast majority of the population I love writing, and there's lots of it to do in English. I like it mainly because i apparently) have a talent for maundering with rather considerable verbosity. :-). What iss the point in being laconic? It doesn't achieve anything.
I just used the dictionary application on my laptop and entered 'blog':
blog
noun
a Web site on which an individual or group of users produces an ongoing narrative
hmm..."ongoing". That means continuous, ceaseless, unfaltering, endless, and none-the-less unremitting. What madness drove me to consider carrying out such an unnecessary and perpetual act of sheer superfluousness? Oh yes, that's right, I remember that people are supposedly to come on and read this. Well folks, i can tell you...if you manage to get to this part of my entry, well done :). Because its been fun writing it...and I hope you enjoy reading it just as much. Hopefully it wont take as long though.
But now as this 2nd period draws to an end, i must finish up and say my fairwells. Cheerio for now, I'll try posting as often as I can from now on.
Bubi xx
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)